Soul Craving

My Name is Huda I am 56 years Old and I am addicted!During the fifteen years I have spent on retreat on my farm in Sri-Lanka!I was fortunate enough to have the space, peace and time to meditate on many aspect of my self, and understand many things i couldn't understand when i was living in our civilized society!In a remote village in Sri-Lanka, I built my own world in the nature, I had no electricity,radio, TV, news Paper! no computer. All i had is a wireless mobile phone connecting me to the outside world, when needed to

Life was very simple and clear, i had my meditation, tending to my animals and farm.Visiting my Guru on regular basis in India was the only where I went beside my monthly visit to Colombo for my monthly Grocery supply.Every Saturday morning i went to the village market for carrots, leaks, and cabbage, which didn't grow in our area and came from the high land!I had a Great Family of Great Danes, they were all what i had for company, and what a great company they were( bless the soul)I called it my Paradise!

The Divine kicked me out of my paradise, (not for eating the apple this time,) just wanted me to come out and be active in other ways of life, the divine knew i was hiding in my farm.And I was, I was sick of modern life, when i started my farm.Change has to come!Back to Civilization and Cyber world ( that is all i have got now)

it took me a while to get adjusted, and stop mourning for the loss of paradise!Being the Addict I am, for LOVE and my own ENERGY, keeps me glued to my laptop so I am addicted to my lap top tooI was awaken to different reality! i found my self living in a dangerous world - where every thing goes! of social games and predators of all kind!

i was awakening to new addictions which have been waved in our life with out being aware of it!every where I looked there was some thing is telling me, you need me, you can't live with out me, i will make you feel better , i will make you feel good about your self , i will make you happy! but all for a small price or for Free!

I was facing addiction! My name is Huda and I am addicted to Coffee and cigarettes!Oh wait And LOVE, my energy, and computerwell, i had many addictions in my life! when i stopped drinking coffee, I got addicted to hot water with lime! and the day i didn't find lime in the supermarket, but lemons, i was having withdrawal symptoms! My brain groves were craving lime! Funny things those Little machines in our skulls, they are rather complicated and in the same way idiots! they would go the way the carrot is dangling, so they cut a grove every time the carrot is being waved and every thing will just follow easy that grove. Every time I see the carrot, my whole being will cry i want it, lets go get itMy 3 years old nephew got hungry and cried I am starved whenever he passed by McDonald in his little buggy!

Being on the hamster wheel 24/7. Bombarded with all kind of seductions. we don't stop much to ask the questions, we are on a fast every thing world.Our brain is on fast food track cutting regular grooves which keep us taking the fast road to the next McDonald! ( in fact that is one of McDonald's big marketing plans, offering kids all seduction so they keep coming, and they have MCDONALD written on their little brain so they can drag their parents in and bring their children back, later) and that is the reality i was awaking to in our society, i am faced with all kind of addictions things i didn't even think is existing!We are all addicted, to water, air, the sun, love,life. and BIG doses of Hormonessome of our addiction have a different consequences on our Brain, personal life, environment , and whomever we come in contact with!how many of us stop for a second and think, why I am doing this for? what will be the result on others lives?there is a mechanic system hidden in our society which is gearing us to play the game, convincing us that we are, less perfect with out this product , or this drink, dress code or whatever they want to sell us, and we blindly play along, video games, with virtual killing, cut a groove to say hurting other is OK!

Whisky advertisement say, Have a good time feel well! did you see the Add on face book which is telling you how High is your friends IQ , and you are the dummy who have none?TV says its perfectly alright to cheat, kill and feel lusting! watch the programming on the CNN news! or your favorite T.V channel!I am sure we can all identify lots of this things in our life, small little thing slipped here and there, without us even knowing, T.V advertisement is one strong programming systematicallythe question is what started the behavior, and what make us craving it! The little organ which we call a Brain is just a machine to process chemical and effect on a body level, it can't think, it cant act other than the way it was wired to do. It can't think!same thing with the physical heart it is just a pump to pump blood to the body it has a function- It can't loveInelegance and love come from soul level.Soul craving for BLISS, LOVE AND CONTENTMENTThat is what creates ADDICTION

We have been programmed to live a material life and to draw our need from outside ourselves, Work,eat, sleep and search for our pleasures from the material world! Ego is creating a separation between you and me, we all have the same needs, to be love, to be appreciated, and to feel safenot having that create anxiety which drive us to feed on each other, in short lived moment of hormonal rush, we are all Hormone junkies in the material life!is the dog walking you?

All of that is meaningless action to the soul,the soul doesn't need that, the soul look for LOVE, BLISS COMMUNE in the ONENESS !That is what the soul needs.When this is missing, it goes stuff the face with materials to fill the void within, searching for love, in an illegal ways, or satisfaction of bliss in a short waves pulses! which last but second, and keep us craving for more of this energy!

In my mind the only bliss is in the soul level! SEX is but a reaction of searching for that bliss, we are all dependent on hormones, which leave us moaning when they are missing on a physical levelThat is what we need look at, why do we behave in a certain way ? and what I gain from that behavior? What I am missing in reality which bring the craving of such gratifying nerve and chemical REACTION

Addiction and irresponsible behavior have a devastating effect on the person, all whom they come in contact with, the whole environment!, to act selfish and just go get my high at any prices with disregards to the consequences, is a typical addiction behavior, addiction is robing us of our human quality, of love, care and being genuine , we tend to lie to cover up the addiction, we go to extremes to get the rush, the HIGH just to survive and satisfy the moment!

How to get away with that Little high and hormone rush without being caught so we can go to the source of addiction for a quick FIX. The Fix is different for each one of us, for some is a drink, for other shopping, a pill, a quick affair. till the game is clear, then we move on to another source and preywe become thieves and murderers not necessarily on physical level but on energy level, vampire are energy thieves who get the high from some one else energy, suck it out , and move to the next victim, so many energy crimes been committed, and the Law is not applying to it!

When I am acting out of heart energy, my actions are in harmony with all that at is, they bring happiness to my soul and whomever in my environment!(I came across 2 sever cases of addiction lately, which broke my heart! one of them is a mother whom is living her son's addiction to destruction!)acting out of selfishness, is an act of violence, violating others in my environments and create separation, hurt and pain.where is the line? what stops me when there is no law to stop me from behaving the way I do?and hurting others lives?I search my soul for what it feels and needs, and i chose what can bring harmony into my world!acting out of consciousness and awareness is the healing of the social Illness we call ADDICTION which is eroding at our core of humanity

Acting out of Oneness, make me ask my self what is the effect of my action on the whole not only on my self, cause i can't live in a world alone!Our intentions not only our action which govern our life.when I am feeling my soul's love, be in Harmony, my action will reflect this energy, not only me will benefit of it, but we will all, we Will feed each other, from our core, anThe effect of Our thoughts on others, thought energy is the energy is existing in our human life!what we do with it, how we use it and how we abuse it?Thought energy is the true machine here which moves every single part of our EXISTENCE!!!!!

where i let my THOUGHTS goes is where my ENERGY grows!where my energy grows is what create my physical reality!Think Bacon you are bacon, think dust you are dust , think God you are God.

LUST is addiction, GREED is an addiction, and addiction is very selfish. doesn't share only takes , and take all and leave nothing for others!

INTEGRITY Is doing the right thing even when no one is looking! living for others approval or disapproval create dishonest human being.Namasté, Peace be with you.